Take What You Need

Last weekend I had the good fortune to gather with eight other writers at an old (potentially haunted) stone manor house for a three-day writing retreat.

English Inn, Victoria, BC - photo by Kate Boorman

It proved to be an excellent location—stunning common areas, rooms that were both beautiful and comfortable, quirky closets and hallways, and, only a short walk away, the Pacific Ocean and a park with curious, abandoned military structures. The manor ghost stopped by from time to time, occasionally knocking from within the walls and causing unplugged phones to ring, but that only added fuel to our already-out-of-control imaginations. Top it off with good food, shop talk, wine, and chocolate, and you’ve got a near perfect retreat.

Each of us spent the majority of our time retreating in our rooms – for me, that meant hours spent fleshing out a new story idea; others were revising or first-drafting; a few were working together on a joint project; and one person was intentionally resting, nurturing her creative spirit in preparation for the heavy workload she knew was ahead. We all did what we needed, what was right for us at the time. It was bliss.

So, writers should all just zip off to a retreat whenever they feel the need, right?

Yeah, I think it’s safe to say, for most of us that’s not gonna happen very often. Before last weekend, it had been four years since I’d managed to get away for a writing retreat. (Too long!) But here’s the thing: it’s vital that we recognize and claim whatever we need to be healthy and productive in our creative lives. Maybe that means indulging in the luxury of a weekend away from all other commitments, but more often than not, it means carving out time in bits and pieces amidst multiple responsibilities.

Whether you’re on deadline and need to get words on the page pronto, or you’re feeling a little battle-worn and desperate for some self-care—wherever you’re at in this creative life right now—carve out the time and space you need. Value your work, and nurture your creative spirit, even if you damn near have to perform miracles to find the resources to do so.

I know it’s hard, especially when we have so many demands on our time, energy, and finances, or when we’re so used to caring for others and putting our own needs on the backburner. Do it anyway. Use that trusty imagination of yours to come up with a plan to meet your own needs. Yes, your writing is worth it. Yes, you are worth it.

Give and Take: Of course, the flip side of "take what you need" is "give what you can". Got a tip on ways to find time to write, or ways to make self-care a priority? Please share! Having a particularly difficult time claiming what you need? Let us know, and maybe the hive-mind of our comments section can help you brainstorm a solution.

Take care, dear writers, and write on.

Why I Write Middle Grade

That kid pedaling the banana seat bike, the metal basket stacked with books from summer reading club?

Yep, that was me.

The girl passing around a well-worn copy of ARE YOU THERE GOD? IT’S ME, MARGARET, to the delight of my giggling friends?

Guilty as charged.

The kid who snuck-read her older sister's copy of THE CAT ATE MY GYMSUIT and DEENIE?

You guessed it.

But I was hardly a book worm. I was more of a closet reader, sneaking words at night.

During the day I was acting like every other “normal” middle grader—pursuing my dream of becoming a superstar.  

For me, that meant ice skating. My plan? Become the next Dorothy Hamill and make the Olympic team by 1984. (Yep, I even sported Dorothy’s signature wedge haircut.)

I still think about sixth grade me—the honors student who spent every non-school moment gliding around a musty ice rink. So what if my jumps barely left the ice. So what if I constantly placed next-to-last in local competitions. I loved the ice and was determined to practice and make it big.

Sixth grade Stefanie felt invincible one day, then defeated the next. (The cold, hard ice has a way of delivering a wallop of reality.) I missed my older sister, away at college. I yearned to stop the chatter of the “skating moms”, who mistook my 57-year-old father for my grandfather. Unlike most of my friends’ mothers, my mom worked full-time, putting in long hours as an industrial nurse. I was proud of the “RN” next to her name. Yet I also felt different. And let’s face it. In middle school, different isn’t always good.

I’d love to swoop back to 1981 and plop a stack of contemporary middle grade books smack-dab on center ice. I would have devoured the following stories:

SUGAR AND ICE, by Kate Messner

BREAKING THE ICE, by Gail Nall

Plus, I would have loved these novels about the many forms of family:

TOUCH BLUE, by Cynthia Lord

THE TRUTH ABOUT TWINKIE PIE, by Kat Yeh

ONE FOR THE MURPHYS, by Lynda Mullaly Hunt

Novels like ABSOLUTELY ALMOST, WONDER, and A CROOKED KIND OF PERFECT would have reminded me that I had strengths and weaknesses, and that it was fine not to have everything figured out by age twelve.

Eventually, I discovered that my strengths involved reading and writing. (Camel spins and axels? Not so much.) After hanging up my skates in high school, I went to college and earned a bachelor’s degree in elementary education and a master’s in language arts curriculum and instruction. Seven years of elementary teaching later, I left the classroom to raise a family.

And now, I write.

I write because I remember my sixth grade self: the reader, the skater, the daughter, the little sister.

I write to tell stories of perfectly imperfect families, the importance of striving for dreams, and the strength that comes from facing adversity.

I write because somewhere deep inside, I remember sixth grade Stefanie.

And I want to tell her it’s going to turn out okay.

Stefanie Wass writes middle grade novels from her home in historic Hudson, Ohio. A member of SCBWI and finalist in the 2012 National Association of Elementary School Principals Book of the Year Contest, her nonfiction credits include the LA Times, Christian Science Monitor, Seattle Times, The Writer, Cleveland Magazine, Akron Beacon Journal, This I Believe, Cup of Comfort, and 15 Chicken Soup for the Soul anthologies. Catch up with her on Twitter @stefwrites and her website: www.stefaniewass.com.

We Want You... To Join Middle Grade Minded

Do you write Middle Grade literature?

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