I thought I'd have an agent by now.
Seriously. I mean, I've been learning quite a bit over the eight years I've been writing. But you know what? I don't have an agent yet and honestly, I'm only mildly disappointed in that. Here's why.
This manuscript I'm querying right now is still only my second MG manuscript. That's right. Only two MG manuscripts for over eight years of work. "Wow. That's pathetic," you might think. But, considering I work as a busy stay home dad of seven school-age children, ran my own tree-pruning business on the side for five years, home-schooled five of the seven kids two of those eight years (while the little two were in diapers) I'm in no position to complain. So I won't.
Instead, I'll marvel at the fact that though I struggled through some serious health issues in the midst of those years, I'm still writing. Actually, I'm even more determined to get better at my craft than ever.
Also, fulls of the manuscript I'm querying right now are out with several agents at the time of this writing. It's my 2018 #Pitchwars manuscript, born of personal pain and spilling over with emotion as a thirteen-year-old Nebraska farm girl reconciles her grief at the death of her baby brother, and her anger at her father for his subsequent drug conviction, with her family's Catholic Faith.
It's not a book everyone is racing to represent. It's very raw and real and as I see it, kind of like life these days. This manuscript will be a hard sell for several reasons. Be it the voice, religious overtones, the main character's constant questioning of her world, or the plot structure of the story itself, my manuscript has yet to connect with the right agent. I'm searching for an agent who feels Blake's struggle and understands it; who appreciates it even.
I'm searching for an agent bold enough to embrace the idea that a girl from a religious family can have her beliefs rocked so hard by personal tragedy yet still grow and learn and find peace.
I'm searching for an agent who gets that my MC, while realizing her own weaknesses also discovers her strengths and learns that her beliefs should be challenged whether they'll eventually change or not.
I'm not too upset that I don't have an agent yet. While I search, I'll keep writing (on my new secret projects) and learning, and I believe I'll eventually find the agent for me.
Wherever you're at in your writing journey, I hope you'll find your agent, or publisher, or make the list or whatever. But above all, I hope for you a journey filled with wonder and growth and possibilities.